I MISS ‘BIGNESS’ (an admittedly doomed critique of current Rock ’n’ Roll)
As I sit listening to Sirius XMU, representing (allegedly) an “alternative to alternative music”, I asked myself a question I’ve been pondering for some time now as a lost, shipwrecked rock ’n’ roll fan:
What’s missing?
What’s….missing ?
I know there used to be something here. Something that I loved. Something I grew up loving. Something that transcended genres, transcended decades. The artists I’ve gravitated towards in my musical life have all had it. The Beatles had (started) it. Led Zeppelin had it. U2 had it. Nirvana had it, Pearl Jam, Soundgarden had it. Oasis had it. Even Radiohead had it.
So did about a million artists from all walks of the musical shangri-La: Aretha Franklin had it. Stevie Wonder had it. Johnny Cash had it. Lady Gaga ha(s) it, Michael Jackson had it, Madonna had it. Bob Marley had it. We could probably add in artists from those forgotten genres, Metal and Country (you know, two enormous genres with millions of fans and very little credibility with Elites in the press and intelligenstia).
That something is Bigness.
That’s fucking it. Don’t laugh. It’s no laughing matter, the extent to which there is a deep abyss of dreary, workout playlist-ready NOTHING in the “Indie” music world today. Smallness rules the day, or the opposite of bigness. Or maybe its failed dropout cousin, mediocrity.
You see, my friends, brothers and sisters, we’re suffering from a terrible infection these days in the “Indie” (Independent — allegedly) music world, that world which has somehow emerged as though on a wiggly-yet-linear path from the rock ’n’ roll innovations and beautiful drug-laden magic that was the 1960’s. Indie “rock” (we need a different word for the current scene) has gone viral — that is to say, it’s suffering from a virus.
The virus is smallness!
Smallness writes tiny lyrics under the guise of irony, when really it’s just having nothing to say.
Smallness can’t play an instrument.
Smallness hides like shy deer in a forest (to paraphrase Nietzsche).
Smallness is just lost. That’s where we are in the “Independent” music scene, a truly laughable term. Smallness doesn’t know it’s head from its ass. It doesn’t understand, so don’t be too harsh with it. But it gave up, maybe without even knowing what happened or why. Before we knew it, we had no more choruses, no more anthems, no more big ideas. No authorship, no passion. No raw emotion. No protest songs — or bands — no 2018 equivalent of Rage Against the Machine, or Social Distortion. No BIG intentions. Smallness is like sustainability — you need it, and yet it’s pointless without dreams, without destiny. Without a larger and more exciting context.
Smallness somehow infected the Indie “alternative” music world after the early 2000’s and never looked back. And you see, it’s a lot like religion. You have to accept the right dogmas, submit to the right formulas, or you’ll be excommunicated like the dog you are.
I say: that’d be one smart fucking dog.
What are those dogmas ? Well for one thing, you have to keep your *intention* tiny. No youthful ideals of taking on the world and changing it forever in your image! You can’t write a huge, anthemic chorus — you can’t, for example, tread on Bruno Mars or Katy Perry territory. Sure, POP artists can go ahead and write tunes you’ll never, ever forget; songs you can sing at karaoke’s with your best friends for decades to come.
But Indie…Indie/Alternative ? The gauntlet has been thrown down — this is the deal, sign on the dotted line if you want to be respectable. Aka, your chorus must be tiny. Minuscule. Infinitesimal. You should feel bad and guilty if it’s bigger than a footnote. Penitence! The verse can go on and on without any (traditional?) songwriting structure, or interesting musical changes (go ahead and google what a Modulation is — bands today are incapable of them). But keep that chorus a sorry excuse for a waste of a listener’s time.
You can’t talk about anything big, either. Who do you think you are, Bob Dylan ? Fuck off. Semi-ironic lyrics only please, preferably written at a level a Kindergartener could’ve come up with. And keep that intention miniscule, for FUCK’s sake! We don’t want the neighbors getting any ideas about changing the world, changing deep structures of Capitalism, real reforms of our participation in digital culture or privacy or any of a thousand different relevant issues to the times we live in. No puns, no interesting wordplays or memorable one-liners. This is not a George Lucas movie after all, so don’t try to have any shameless, dumb fun. Oh — yes, and don’t be fun-loving, either. Take yourself incredibly seriously. Don’t write anything meaningful AND humorous, with amazing lyrics and profundity, even verbose use of other languages and ideas, none of that shit.
Oh, were you hoping to COMBINE a great chorus with a hopeful, deep, and poetic lyrics, a la say a song like “One” by U2 ? Or maybe something dark and biblical, like ‘Black Hole Sun’ by Soundgarden ? No. Get out.
Our church of Indie “rock” (crap) is so Independent, so thoughtful, so original, we primarily use iPhones (or iPads) to write the music. Yes — occasionally we use “real” instruments like guitars (what is the difference though). But — we play them badly. We are digital age young rockers, often white and upper middle class, but we haven’t taken lessons or learned anything of substance — so you’d FUCKING better not embarrass us with virtuosity!
Virtuosity: N. “Great skill in music or another artistic pursuit.” Jazz musicians, classical musicians, these are (almost without fail) virtuosos at their instruments.
Bands — Rock bands — regularly used to have some level of virtuosity in their musicianship, or vocalists. Not all bands, true. And different scenes across different genres have tended to produce more or less of certain kinds of instrument or vocal talent, also true. But it’s striking the total, complete abandonment of anything resembling instrument mastery in today’s Indie rock world.
Bigness — I hardly knew ye ! Ah, fair bigness. Will we only meet you in your final resting place: EVERYWHERE and ANYWHERE else than good ol’ Rock ’n’ Roll ? Your true destination right now is Pop music, and Hip-Hop. Maybe that’s your eternal future.
So, summing up:
Once upon a time, bands were allowed (indeed, supposed) to write tunes that had big, meaty, satisfying choruses.
This didn’t necessarily make them artistic, sublime, or interesting. But — it also didn’t rule that out one iota, either.
And bands could be larger than life; stage presence; identification from audience to performer in the role of transcending your station in life.
And they wanted to be huge, many of them. They desired things. They had things like “intentions” and “dreams”.
I know I used to love bands that could play their instruments well, to varying degrees. This didn’t preclude the use of technology (far from it!), but it was a complement to some level of accomplishment, pride, and wonder on an instrument’s performance.
I know I used to love the shameless ambition and “all about it-ness” of Rock ’n’ Roll. That shit is loooooong gone. Hip-Hop is its current Stanley Cup holder.
I know I used to love it when I didn’t have to write blogs like this to commiserate with anyone else who feels like me, because I damn sure haven’t read even one article from one writer who correctly sees how little passion, how little raw, honest, brutal emotion the “Indie” rock scene currently produces. It’s far beyond that: it actually discourages it. You have to be all synth, all minimalist, all serious, all ironic, all branded, all accepting of influencer, branded-fucking-underwear new norms bands used to have issues with. You have to write small lyrics. You can’t question the Christian Right, you can’t write songs with controversial subjects, you can’t have anything to say about whether life is pointless or there is a God (or isn’t one).
You can’t have any bigness. Well, call me old fashioned. I want it back.
